16 Mar 2016

Explaining Behaviour : Shopaholics


Hope at the horizon

Anyone who heard the term Retail Therapy knows what I will be referring to in this article.  Those who don’t know the term, may still have experienced the pleasure that is given by treating ourselves buying things for our own use and purpose, particularly if we do not need them.

Most people have indulged in some needless purchasing on occasions.  We may do it if we had a hard day at work, if we are upset about something, if we have had some unusual stressful situation to contend with, and so on. 

People with a balanced and fulfilled emotional life will seldom do this, and thoroughly enjoy it.  There are those, however, who constantly crawl from shop to shop, from website to website, from credit card to credit, to support the need they have to shop.

These are people who feel that nobody is going to reward them, so they reward themselves by buying clothes to make them feel better. They have a hope that if they buy this clothing it will feel and look great, or they spend on some furniture, or kictchen appliances, they will be satisfied.

Unfortunately, the underlying reason for their incessant shopping is that they don't like themselves.  so as soon as they try the clothes on and look in the mirror they don't like what they see so get deflated and sad. They put the clothes in the wardrobe as out of sight is out of mind.

As they put the clothes or accessories away they need to buy wardrobe after wardrobe full of things with their labels on. They are so grateful to have friends that they are always trying to buy them. If a friend says that they like that clothing the shopaholic will immediately ask them to try it on and say that it looks better on you so please have it.

User and manipulator friends will get as much as they can wheedle out of the shopaholic by flattering them. Just see how flattering they would be if they were refused! When the shopaholic suggests a night out the shopaholic pays the bill and says it's their treat.

It takes care and love for these people to heal, and after healing they get their confidence back and I advise them to put a price on each item and have a sale at home. Watch to see what friends come and ask if they can have the item for free " as we are friends" and that will show who are real friends.

From the proceeds from the sale including the wardrobes! they can either pay their credit cards off or give it to charity.